Today was yet another very hard day without Ed, I was notified by the Funeral home that his remains were ready to be picked up. When I arrived at the Funeral home a funeral director, I believe Mark was his name brought me out the Plastic-box like Urns, he explained to me that my husband was too big to fit into a single urn, so he was put into 2. I cannot explain the depth of my heart-break upon holding his remains. They are in a beautiful Burgundy velvet like bag with a drawstring. Earlier in the week I had asked Vanessa the woman I made the arraignments with if it were possible to get a lock of Ed's hair, I was so grateful to see that yes she was able to do so. I was also given his keys, cell phone, his leatherman knife he carried every where. With 2 pens, and a $1.36 in change that he had in his pockets. Seeing his keys & cell phone made me feel even more his loss the realization that all the dreams & goals we had will never be filled. It was his greatest wish/want to write a book about our lives together and all the struggles we've been through. I plan on keeping this goal for him, plus other goals & dreams we spoke about. Thing will never be the same- but as long as I live I will never forget him, or stop loving him, he will always be my husband, death cannot change that.

For God so loved the world that He gave His only-begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. For God sent not His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved. John 3:16,17 Sammy - I am so sorry that this happened - I am praying that you are OK-

Dear Sam. My heart is breaking for you. My heart is breaking for me, and for all the people who love Ed dearly. But my heart breaks most for you. Please know that you are in my prayers.